


My pain for your happiness

by Kilz



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: 1 chapter per week, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bucky is back, Captain America: Winter soldier canon-divergence, Hurt Tony, Hurt/Comfort, Insane Bucky, Insecure Tony, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mizo writer, Multiple chapters, Oblivious Steve, Pining Tony, Steve & Tony are best friends, he hates Tony, one-sided Steve/Bucky - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-11
Packaged: 2019-11-08 02:53:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17973095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kilz/pseuds/Kilz
Summary: Steve finally found Bucky and to help with his recovery Tony offered him a place at the tower. Seeing the relationship between his best friend and the billionaire ,Bucky became jealous of Tony. Soon Tony starts getting into a series of accidents.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t particularly like Bucky but I don’t hate him either. Just want him to be mean to Tony for this story. The reason why Bucky in this fanfic is like this is because as I have said before, a recovery stage, so he is in the middle of the ‘Bucky’ Steve knew and the Bucky that became the Winter Soldier so he’s kind of insane.
> 
> (English is not my native language. Please bear with me)
> 
> 1st chapter is fluffy~ it'll start getting angsty from the next~

If you had told Tony Stark that he would become best friends with Steve Rogers he would fully deny anything like that could ever happen, like in a million years. He’d laugh it off and might even add that you’re insane to say something as unbelievable as that. Or even to get your head checked for getting that crazy idea in the first place. But fate and chance sure changed that for him.

If anyone saw how the two of them had treated each other on their first meeting they also wouldn’t believe it either. They were polar opposites. Like fire and ice. Always repelling each other, never able to agree on anything without starting an argument first. But it happened anyway. As time went by and they really got to know each other, not just what they show on the outside but how they really were on the inside as well. They both found that they weren’t so different from each other.

Starting from getting each other’s back, from serious quarrels to playful banters, spending their off time together doing whatever came to mind (Tony’s mostly, which included getting Steve to watch all the fan favorite movies ever made. They would have their separate movie nights for that) to sharing their own inside jokes the two of them were now undeniably the best of friends.

And Tony, he couldn’t deny that it didn’t made him happy to be called Steve Rogers aka Captain America’s best friend in the 21st century.

So when Steve had confessed to him about Bucky being alive, brainwashed to work under Hydra as the Winter Soldier and how his best friend had killed his parents Tony didn’t know what to do. If they were their previous antagonistic-selves he would simply beat the crap out of the guy and kick him out of his tower. Maybe even quit the Avengers altogether. He would just have more reasons to hate the guy. It would have been so much easier to hate him. But Steve was his best friend now. Which made it so much harder.

And to think he told him this just before they got to watch the movie planned for that night. Way to ruin the mood.

Should he just accept it and move on? It wasn’t like anything could be changed. It’s something that had happened so long ago. But it still hurts more than he’d like to. He quickly ran passed Steve, getting out of the blond’s room and into his own, telling Jarvis to shut the door and forbid anyone from entering. The A.I responded that it was done and Tony quickly dived onto his bed. Burrowing his already tear stained eyes into the pillow.

He was secretly glad that Steve had decided not to go after him. He seriously couldn’t handle the super soldier right now. Right now he fucking needed to be alone. He had to get his emotions together because at the moment, they were all over the place.

The little happy memories he had of his mother came rushing to him. The time when she would take time off from her busy schedules of going to places with Howard or organizing charity parties, simply to spent time with her son and teach him how to play the piano (Her amazing talent which she hadn’t pursued after getting married with his father). She would be so happy. The only time Tony would get to see her tender loving smile and know that even if she doesn’t always show it she had loved him dearly.

She may have not been a very good mom but she was the only one he got and it made the truth about her death even sadder. To die in the hands of a cold blooded killer.

God, everything hurts. Why couldn’t the person who killed his parents be just some random Hydra soldier? Why did it have to be Barnes, Steve’s best friend since childhood? It was so complicated he can’t even laugh about it.

That night Tony cried himself to sleep.

 

~

It was almost a week since he and Steve had that conversation and that’s the same amount of time the two of them hadn’t talked to each other, properly that is. Well, Steve tried to, where else Tony couldn’t help but avoid him as if he’s carrying the plague. He knew it wasn’t his fault. The guy got no reason to be treated like this but the brunet can’t help it.

He just couldn’t face Steve. Not for a few more days.

They still worked together well, like that of finely tuned machines in the field as if they never had a problem in the first place. But their private life was a whole other thing. Tony didn’t speak to their captain for anything other than what was absolutely necessary both during missions and at home. He even avoided coming to team bonding activities like having lunch, playing cards or watching movies together.

The others couldn’t do much either when they heard about the incident. They knew how Tony would feel about all this, that he was heartbroken and in pain to hear about the news of his parents. That it will be quite a while before the brunet would feel better, things like this takes time to heal. The team didn’t hold it against Steve for the whole mess because they knew what he had done was the right thing to do. They believed that Tony will eventually come around to it. But for now, all they could do was watch their teammates try and settle it between themselves. They eventually would, they were best friends after all.

“Tony, please. Don’t avoid me like this.” Steve had told him one evening after they had just got back from some Avengers business they had to take care of. The super soldier had stopped him as he was making a beeline for his workshop.

“What? I’m not totally avoiding you, am I? I listened and followed all your orders during mission and worked well with the rest of the team so I’d like it if you leave me alone, Cap.” Tony scoffed. “I got work to do.”

“I can’t stand it, Tony. I don’t like it when we are like this.” He pleaded.

“Well, I don’t either. But I don’t want to talk to you so that’s that.”

"But Tony-"

Tony brushed passed Steve, bumping against his shoulder rather harshly as he did and closed off the workshop door as soon as he got inside. Telling Jarvis not to disturb him unless a world threatening danger occurred.

He spent some time to upgrade the repulsor of his armor as well as tweaking his teammate’s weapons for better performance in the battlefield. He didn’t feel like doing a whole new upgrade for them right then so that should do for now. He had been working for a whole five hour and his shoulders were starting to ache. He figured it was a good time to take a break.

He sat up straight on the chair and stretched his arms. God, that felt nice. He looked over at DUM-E and told him to make some coffee for him. The bot soon returned with a cup, looking quite excited because it had been a while since he was asked by his master to make him something. But when Tony looked inside the cup contained something which looked like coffee but smelled nothing like one. The engineer sighs.

“That’s not coffee a human being drinks. That’s motor oil; I can’t drink motor oil, DUM-E.” He says tiredly. He hadn't been able to have a goodnight sleep ever since that night nor was his appetite any good. His face was visibly tired and his eyes red with dark circles. He got up as he put the cup on his desk and went to the counter to make one himself.

After he returned with a hot, edible cup of coffee he sat on the couch and looked out at the night view. He felt as if everyone was feeling quite happy down there. Families spending time together, the kids smiling and laughing as they hold on to their parent’s hands. Group of friends who were out drinking, some playfully chasing each other on the streets.

He thought back to the time Steve told him the big news of his parent’s murder as he occasionally took a sip of his coffee.

Maybe he was taking this too seriously. Steve was brave enough to tell him about it even though he was sure Tony would be hurt by it. He hadn’t hidden it from him. That would have been a hundred times worse.

Tony was beginning to actually feel relief and happy that Steve had told him now that he was able to think back on everything that had happened with a clear mind. He thinks it’s finally time to let things go. Prolonging this was of no use at all. And frankly he missed his best friend. They had a lot of movies they had to catch up to.

And after that long while of brooding a gentle smile finally adorned his face.

 

~

 

Tony went over to Steve’s room, standing just outside his door. It had been a while and for some reason he was feeling quite nervous to even knock on his door. He awkwardly stood there with his hand hanging in midair, grimacing. Dammit, it’s just knocking the door, why was it such a hard thing to do right now? He’d done this a tons of times before all this shit.

He stood there for another five minutes or so trying to calm his nerves. Gathering enough courage to finally knock on the damn door. He heard a scuttling sound from inside as if Steve was currently busy with something or someone. Tony felt weird and somewhat angry at the thought that Steve would have someone in his room right now.

Wait, that was none of his business. Steve could bring a girl or two to the tower if he wanted. Tony’s got no problem with that. But, geez! Maybe he should come back another time.

“Who is it? Wait just a sec”, came the blonds’ voice. The door soon swung open and out came a tousled looking super soldier. His eyes widened in surprise on finding out that it was Tony.

Good, he was alone.

“Tony?...Um, what are you doing here? I mean..” He started, not knowing how to really continue his sentence.

“I just wanted to have a talk. Am I catching you at a bad time?” Tony says meekly.

“No, no. Now is fine. Please come in.”

Steve ushered him towards his bed, motioning him to take a seat. He was soon joined by the super soldier who looked like he was at a loss for words. “So, what can I do for you?”, he finally asked after some time. Scratching the back of his neck in a nervous manner.

“I wanted to apologize.” He started getting the blond’s attention; he then turned to look him straight in the eyes. “Steve, I’ve been an insufferable idiot the past week and I’m so sorry for the way I behaved with you. I was just so mad! And even though it wasn’t your fault I put all the blame on you when it was actually my fault. Please,... forgive me.” He says with glassy red, tired eyes.

Steve hates to see him like that. “God, Tony. Please don’t do that. It wasn’t your fault, Tony. How you reacted was totally normal. I’d be more worried if you weren’t.” Steve says as he brought him into a hug.

“But I treated you coldly over the past few days and stubbornly ignored you even when you wanted to talk to me. I feel so terrible.” He says choking up at the end, burrowing his head in the crook of Steve’s neck. Loosely returning the embrace.

“Tony, are you crying?” Steve asks but Tony quickly shook his head. He sighs. “I don’t care about all of that anymore. You have already apologized and honestly I’m happy with you just talking to me like this. I missed you, Tony.”

Tony’s eyes widened a bit at that. Then a smile starts to form on his lips. “I missed you too, idiot. You really forgive me?”

“How could I not? You’re my best friend. Apology gladly accepted.”

Tony laughed; it felt good to do that. His heart finally felt like a weight has been lifted. Steve wiped away his tears with the soft stroke of his thumb, smiling at the brunet ever so sweetly. Tony couldn’t help but blush on receiving such an intimate gesture from Steve.

Steve suddenly grabbed on his shoulders, opening his mouth in an attempt to say something, looking all serious. But all that came out was, “There are a lot of movies we’re behind on since last week. Mind if we get back to them?”

Tony mentally face-palmed. “I thought you were gonna ask me something serious. You got me all worked up for nothing.” He says with an amused pout, giving the blond a light punch on his shoulder.

Steve smiled. “What? It was an important question to me. I didn’t want to watch them by myself. I enjoy it best when I’m watching it with you.” Hearing that made Tony happier than it should.

“I guess it can’t be helped that I’m such a great person to be with.” He says crossing his arm. “Alright, go get the TV and DVDs ready, soldier. Oh, and by the way it’s your turn to prepare the snacks.” He continues in an off handed manner trying to act calm.

A chuckle escape from Steve’s as he gave one last look at the brunet before he went into his kitchen to prepare said snacks.

When Steve came back they huddled on his bed, sat close to each other and shared the blanket. Tony had a pillow he was holding onto as a kind of body pillow. He just liked having something to grab on.

With a flick of the remote the movie started.

He had missed this. Spending time with Steve like this was what he always looked forward to, the highlight of his day. He loved the warmth that Steve gave off when he sat close to him. The way their shoulders would occasionally bumped against each other, the way Steve would sneak a glance at him, smiling ever so slightly. It felt great.

.

.

.

.

Watching a whole week worth of movies in one night was NOT a good idea. When Tony got up his whole body ached like he’d done a strict training session the other night. He had forgotten that he never got back to his room that night and fell down from the bed screaming when he felt someone shifting under the blankets.

That woke up the soldier in an instant. Steve couldn’t help but laugh at his best friend who was sprawled on the floor, looking as shocked as can be.

“Good morning, Tony. Had a nice sleep?” He says in a teasing voice.

“Good morning my ass. Lend me a hand here. Isn’t Captain America supposed to me a chivalrous person?” Tony says as he stretched out his hand and soon found himself pulled up by Steve who kept smiling at him. He really wants to wipe that smug smile from his face.

“Coffee?”

“Yes. Coffee.”

With that they went out the room. Tony couldn’t stop feeling flustered on the fact that he had spent last night sleeping on the same bed as Steve. But Steve doesn’t look like that bothered him at all. Yeah, he was over reacting. It’s normal for best friends to sleep on the same bed. Totally normal.

They stumbled into the kitchen together and greeted their friends already there a ‘good morning’ in unison. Tony pulled put a chair to sit on while Steve made them coffee.

They gave the both of them an amused look. “I see the two of you have made up. That’s good.” Natasha says with a small smirk.

“More like they had a make-up sex to me.”, Clint commented with a cheeky smile. Tony choked on his saliva.

“No! We did not!" Tony exclaimed, horrified and embarrassed. "What the fuck, Clint? How the hell did you deduce that?” He says raising his eyebrow in a mocking manner.

“You both look totally disheveled like you had a rough sexy night. Also I saw you enter Cap’s room and I guessed you never left~”

“Oh my god. Barton, you ass! That’s so not what happened.”

“You don’t have to deny it, Tony. We’ll still love you all the same.”

“That’s it. You’re not getting any new upgrade from me. I hope SHIELD’s tech doing it for you.”

“I don’t hear you denying you spent the night together~”

“Aaargh! Steve, tell him to stop.” Tony begged in frustration.

“Alright, that’s enough, Clint. Stop antagonizing Tony. That’s an order.” Steve says from the counter, trying to grab a pan to make some omelette for breakfast. Tony stuck out his tongue at Clint.

“That’s not fair, Cap. You always take his side. Just because you got the h-!” Clint was cut off abruptly by a pan flying straight to his face, knocking him down from his seat with a loud thud. He groaned in pain caressing his face with his hands, rolling on the floor.

Tony’s mouth gaped open like a fish.

“Archer, are you alright?” Thor asked looking down from his cereal bowl as Natasha simply says ‘that’s gonna leave a mark’ as she continued polishing her guns. Bruce smiled nervously.

Soon realizing his action Steve’s eyes widened in shock, his cheeks going red. “Oh god! Clint, I’m so sorry.” He grimaced as he ran to him.

“Not cool, man. Not cool. That fucking hurts!” Clint hissed as he was helped up. The super soldier apologized again. He suggested taking him to the infirmary but the archer shook him off saying he was fine, it wasn’t needed and made his way to his room to get patched up. Bruce got up too, following him and signaling his teammates that he’ll take care of it.

Soon the rest of the team left leaving him and Steve.

“What was that all about?” Tony asks.

“What was what?”

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe the part where you hit Clint with a pan?”

“Just a slip of the hand.” Steve says avoiding his gaze. Yeah, right. He didn’t believe him one bit. “I, ah, SHIELD wanted me for a covert operation so see you later, Tony.” With that the blond hurried out the room. Tony tilted his head utterly confused.

That night Steve went down to Tony’s lab to bring him a cup of freshly brewed coffee and some snacks like he always did. It felt good to go back to their usual routine. He saw him working on advanced things he barely understands like always. Steve smiled to himself as he approached him.

“Working hard as usual I see.” Steve says as he set down the cup and snacks on the free space of the table Tony was using.

“You work hard by doing vigorous training and I work hard doing these stuffs.....I was starting to think I won’t get to see you tonight.”

“What? Missed me already?” Steve teased.

“Nahhh.” He paused. “Maybe a little.” He admitted looking away.

At that moment Steve found his best friend to be quite….adorable. He shakes his head. That’s not something you think of your best friend, let alone a man. He was brought back to reality when Tony pokes him on his side.

“Got something on your mind?”

“No.” He answers rather sharply. “Um, not really.” He corrected himself.

“It must be Bucky, right?” Tony says sounding a bit sad but before he could explain himself Tony cut him off saying, “I made a program to help you locate the Winter Soldier based image recognition using the collective network of CCTVs across the world . It’s almost ready so just wait a little more days alright?”

“Wow, Tony. Thank you so much. I don’t really know what else to say. You are truly amazing.”

“What else do you expect from a genius such as myself?”

“Nothing but the best.” Steve says proudly. Tony smirks. “I guess I’ll leave you to it now. Goodnight, Tony.”

“Night, Cap. Thanks for the snack.” With a warm smile from Steve he got back to work.

 

 

Two days later Tony finished the program and told Steve about it. Using it they soon located the soldier and that night Steve and Natasha made plans.

The next morning Tony rushed out to the helipad hoping to catch Steve before he went out to retrieve the Winter Soldier. He was late for his meeting but what the hell. Wishing Steve good luck for his mission was more important to him. He’d need it. He _was_ gonna try and take down a professional assassin.

He was lucky he caught him just before the Avenjet took off. Steve was dressed in his Captain America gear and currently doing some last minute check and Natasha already in the pilot seat, ready to go.

“Tony? I thought you were at your meeting already.” Steve says amazed.

“Well, I wanted to see you off and wish you luck. What? I can’t do that?” He raises an eyebrow.

“No, of course you can. I’m really happy you did. Thank you, Tony.” He let out a satisfied sigh. “I’ll be back soon. Have fun at your meeting.” He tells him with a smile.

“I’ll try, though it’s practically impossible to have fun at meetings, Steve, especially SI meetings.” Tony deadpanned.

That earned him a chuckle from the super soldier which the brunet returned. And with one last look Steve went inside the Avenjet and took off. Tony watched for a while until there was only a speck of black dot in the sky and went for his meeting. The rest of his day went unbelievably boring. He wished Steve was back already.

 

Steve and Natasha didn’t come back for the next three days. Tony was starting to feel restless with all the waiting. He would keep walking back and forth in the common room as his teammates watched him do this for hours on end until Clint got fed up and forced him to sit down. Even when he was in his workshop he couldn’t concentrate either.

On the fourth day Steve finally came back and he wasn’t alone. He and Natasha had brought back the Winter Soldier with them.

Tony ran out of his workshop to greet them. Feeling excited for Steve that he was able to finally bring back his long lost friend though a small part of him felt sad about it. Because from then on he’ll be the second best friend of Steve Rogers, because Bucky Barnes would always take top place in that aspect. And he was okay with that. He’s fine.

When he approached the hanger he saw Steve and the rest of the avengers who were already present and a new face which was James Bucky Barnes. He felt his chest tighten at the name. This person did kill his parents. But as Steve had said, he was controlled by Hydra so he shouldn’t just hate the guy. That’s just not fair.

“Tony! Come meet Bucky.” Steve called out to him, waving with a huge smile as soon as he saw him. The guy looked beat up and his exhaustion showed but that smile of his makes up for all that. Tony nodded returning the smile, walking up to them.

“Bucky, meet Tony Stark. He’s my best friend in the 21st century.” Steve introduced them to each other, clearly excited to meet up his two best friends.

They shook hands. One smiled as the other simply stares.

For some reason he felt like Barnes was squeezing his hands a bit too hard. But Tony shrugged it off as the soldier’s nervousness. Little did he know that from that day on his life would never be so peaceful again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony realises his feelings for Steve and Bucky resorts to painful methods.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have sooooo many assignments this week I seriously had no time to properly write fanfic updates. Sorry in advance if this wasn't written well enough. I promise it would be better next time.
> 
> (MZU sports is killing me (╥_╥)

After Tony sent off Steve and Natasha to freshen up from their tiresome mission he offered to show Bucky his new place in the tower. Giving him a quick tour while he was at it to get him familiar with the surroundings.

Tony then showed Bucky to his room which was located the nearest to Steve’s. He thought it would help since it doesn’t look like anyone else would be able to handle him well. Steve was the only one he recognized and the rest of them were complete stranger to the guy.

“Here’s your room. I hope you like it. I just left it with the basic necessities since you seem like a simple type of guy. You can later decorate it to suit your taste.” Tony says with a grin, feeling quite happy with his choice.

Bucky remained silent.

“Okay~…”

.

.

.

This is so awkward. At least say something! I’m being a welcoming host for you, you know. Show some gratitude. Even a small smile is fine. Just do anything other than glare at me. He thought, annoyed.

He then heard a sigh and saw that the guy looked pretty down.

“. . . um, are you alright?” Tony says reaching out to give a comforting pat on the shoulder but as soon as the taller brunet noticed the gesture he slapped it away harshly. Tony swiftly retracted his hand with an ‘Ow!’, blowing at his stinging hand. Bucky took this chance to go inside the room and closed it behind him. Not even a word of apology for his action.

Tony was furious at first but then he let out a sad sigh, looking down at his feet. “I guess he doesn’t like me, huh?” He says clutching on his hand as he quietly walked away.

 

=

 

Tony adjusted the hem of his shirt as he waited outside the conference room of SHIELD. The cold and quietness of the place sent a shiver up his spine. Why did secret meeting places always have to be so dim and cold? Why did they have to build it in some underground classified area where proper air conditioning wasn’t even provided?

He occasionally had to glance on his Stark Phone to avoid the piercing glare of the guards present around the room. He let out a silent frustrated groan.

How much longer do they have to wait?

It may not be clear but if one looks closely at the billionaire it can be seen that he looked a bit nervous and quite anxious for the impending meeting with SHIELD and the US officials on the topic of the Winter Soldier.

He and the rest of the team knew how Barnes was brainwashed into doing those crimes and atrocities and they believe Steve when he told them how his friend was trying to fight back Hydra’s control over him and started gaining back his memories. Even if they didn’t trust the guy either just handing him to the government seems like a cruel thing to do. Who knows what they would do to the guy.

So they wanted to help him in their own way instead. The best hand was in their own. And they got way better equipments to help him anyway.

On his part Tony had opened his doors for Bucky. Letting him stay in the tower with the rest of them and find ways to help him recover. And now here he was, trying to fight on his behalf against SHIELD and practically the country for Bucky who seemed like he didn't even like him from yesterday’s action.

He looked over to Steve who had come with him for the case. Tony noted that he looked just as anxious if not more. He looked dead tired too. He had just found his supposedly long dead best friend just a day ago and now he could be taken away again. He also knew how tired Steve was. He hadn’t gotten a wink of a goodnight sleep because as soon as SHIELD had heard of the Winter Soldier’s capture they had wanted to bring him in and answer for his crimes.

“Steve, you okay?” Tony asks as he sat beside him, bringing his arm around for a comforting pat on the soldier’s back. The blond nodded, sitting up and looking straight at the brown of Tony’s eyes. His eyes were red and had bags under them. He looked so fucking worn out that Tony just wants to bring him into his arms. Take him home, feed him some delicious food and sent him straight to bed. The guy deserves it.

“I’m just really worried about Bucky.” He started. “I know he’d done a lot of bad things in the past but that wasn’t him. He was being controlled by Hydra all that time and now that I finally found him and have in my grasp I can’t lose him again, Tony. I just can’t. He’s all I have left of the past.”

He had looked so pained in the last part. Barely choking out the words. It made Tony’s resolve even stronger. He may not like Bucky but Steve, he did. Quite a lot to be exact.

He would do it for Steve.

“Everything’s gonna be fine, Cap. Leave it to me. I’ll get it done. And after this meeting you won’t ever have to worry about Bucky being taken away. He’ll be right where he should be, with you.” Tony felt hurt saying that part but he quickly shook his head. “I promise. So, stop being all gloomy and shit, it doesn’t suit you.”

Steve laughed. His smile looks wry but genuine all the same. “I’m positive that you’re the only who can cheer me up even at my worst.” Steve says as his hands came up to cup the brunet’s face and leaning closer to him.

Tony’s brain short circuited. What the hell was he up to? Was Steve trying to kiss him or what?! He’s getting so close!

Tony shut his eyes tight. Unable to face the super soldier.

For a second, Steve’s eyes landed on Tony’s soft looking slightly chapped lips. He then let out a chuckle on seeing Tony’s trembling self and shook his head with a fond smile.

Tony was surprised when he felt Steve embrace him into a warm, heartfelt hug instead. But that didn't make it any less a heart pounding experience for him.

Tony didn’t know what do to do except sit there frozen like a statue. He could feel Steve’s breath on his neck making his whole body tingle. And for some reason his heart was pounding at a rate it never did before. If it was pounding any faster he felt that it’d jump out from his chest. He was positive that even Steve was able to hear it in their current position.

His whole body was burning up. Was he getting sick or what?

“I’m so lucky to have you by my side.” Steve whispers in that low husky voice of his.

It finally hits him.

Coming at him like a huge meteor hitting the dam of his locked up feelings. The over flowing affection and want he felt for his best friend all burst out in an instant and at that moment Tony knew he was in love with Steve Rogers.

He just couldn’t deny that anymore.

He always knew his strong feelings for Steve wasn't just as a best friend. Rhodey was his best friend too but he didn't feel like this for the guy. When he wonders about life without Steve he found it to be unbearable. He just couldn't imagine his life without Steve in it. It just won't be complete.

He returned the embrace with all the love and comfort he could channel through the hug. Steve’s arms tightened around him and they stayed like that, just holding onto each other.

 

“Ahem.” A voice interrupted from behind.

Tony’s eyes widened in surprise. He looked up and saw Fury, who was giving him a deadpanned expression. And standing a few foot behind him were the US officials.

He had totally forgotten about the meeting and where they were, getting swept up in his new found feelings. He hastily shoved the super soldier off him with a 'oof', stood up and adjusted himself.

“I hope we weren’t disturbing you two.” Fury says raising an eyebrow.

“Of course you weren’t, Nick. I was just giving our mopey Captain a shoulder to lean on. He’s like this cause you guys are hell bend on capturing his friend.”

“Uh huh. I don’t care what really happened and I don’t want to know either. Let’s just get the meeting started.” With that he walked towards the conference door, punched in a number and entered the room followed by the officials and Tony and Steve in the last.

“So, what’s this ridiculous idea of you Avengers holding the Winter Soldier instead of giving him over to us? You know the bastard had been a pain in the ass for centuries. He needs to be taken in.” Fury says looking dead serious. All the other people in the room nodded their head in agreement except for Tony and Steve.

“I, no ‘we’ get it, Nick. That Bucky Barnes as the Winter Soldier has caused a lot of casualties and crimes over the past 20 years but I think we get a say on whether we want to hand him over or not. You people have tried for years to capture and bring him in, right? But who are the ones who actually made that happen? Us. The Avengers made it happen. We can handle it even if he escapes or go astray. You don't need to worry.”

“Things aren't as simple as that, Stark. Did you  not tell us that he was brainwashed by Hydra? You don’t know what he would be capable of until it can be confirmed that he had fully escaped their mind control.”

“That will be taken care of. I have people who can help with that.”

The room remained silent.

"If there's no more problem to point out I guess we can call it done?" He eyes the director. " Are we done,Fury?"

Fury let out a long deep sigh. “You play a dangerous game, Stark. You might regret this."

“It’s part of the job. I can handle it.” The billionaire simply replies. Seeing his determination the agent finally gave in.

“Alright, fine. If you Avengers think you’ll be able to handle Barnes we’ll leave him to you for the time being. But on two conditions. One, if he ever goes out of line we’ll take him in. No questions asked. Two, he is not to take even one step out of the tower without at least one of you with him. Is that understood?”

And with that the case was done and a deal was made. Even though it didn’t go exactly as he wanted it to the odds was still in their favor so he was happy about that at least.

Tony breathe a sigh of relief, slumping back on the chair as soon as all the rest of the personnel went out. With this Bucky was safe under their wing.

“Tony, you did it! Thank you so much.” Steve says hugging him from behind, laughing and smiling happily.

“Yay for us.” Stop hugging me dammit. 

 

=

 

The ride back to the tower was kind of awkward. Awkward for Tony that is. Now that he had realized how he truly felt about Steve being alone with him made him unnecessarily flustered and fidgety.

“Hey, Tony?” Steve says looking at the brunet who was sitting at the end of the seat, as far apart as he could manage in the car.

“Yeah?” He didn’t even dare turn around. Afraid that Cap could see how red his face was right then.

“Why are you sitting so far away?” 

“What? I’m not. . . I just felt like looking out at the view. The wind feels great. It’s so refreshing. You should probably scoot over on your side, way over there and feel it too. You’ll love it.” Tony replies, laughing oddly. Pointedly looking out the window with one hand on his chin.

Steve stares at the back of Tony’s head, tilting his head in a confused manner. He knew Tony was acting strange but he didn’t want to push him about it so he let it be. Asking no further questions for the rest of the ride home. Wordlessly staring out the window like the brunet previously suggested.

Happy, Tony’s friend and driver, watched the exchange through the rear view mirror of the car. He could feel the awkward atmosphere seeping from behind.

Whenever his boss was with the Captain the backseat would be filled with constant chatter and laughs. It was rare for them to be with each other and be so quite unless they were having their occasional fights but they didn't seem like they were having one so what's going on?

Looking closely he could notice that the brunet's ears were bright red but he decided not to comment on it at the moment.

After another fifteen minutes ride they finally reached the tower’s parking lot. Steve came out first followed by Tony on the other side and made their way to the elevator.

Happy quickly ran after his boss.

“Boss, your face is all red. Are you sick? Do I need to call an ambulance?” Happy says, all ready with his phone. Tony could see the nearby hospital’s ambulance number on the screen, just waiting to be dialed if needed.

That made him went even redder. “I knew it. I’m red like a tomato, aren’t I?” He asks worriedly and Happy dumbly nodded.

Tony groaned. “I can’t face Steve like this.”

“Should I call the ambulance now?” Happy suggested, getting worried with his boss’ antics.

“That’s not needed. Just get me something cold. Do you have any ice on you? I need ice.”

Happy thought for a while and ran back to the car. Just then Steve looked back, noticing that a certain brunet wasn’t behind him. “Tony? What are you doing standing there for?” He furrowed his brows at him.

Tony flinched. “Nothing. Happy is getting some ice for me. You go on ahead if you want.”

“Ice?” He paused. “That’s fine. I’ll wait for you.” Saying that he went over and stood by the elevator door.

Happy came back with ice cubes which he took from the champagne bucket wrapped up in a cloth and handed it to Tony who hurriedly took it and ran into the elevator.

 

Inside the elevator~

Steve watches Tony buried his face onto the pile of ice, standing still beside him. The brunet was like that for a whole two minutes now. Was he alright?

“Tony?”

“Almost done. Just wait ten more seconds.” He mumbled through the ice. Steve complied with  shrug.

“Alright. Done. How do I look?”

“Wet.” Steve replies bluntly.

“Not literally, Cap. I’m not red anymore, right?”

“Uh, yeah. You aren’t. . .” He says confused, not quite getting it.

“Great! So I got this idea while I had my face in the ice. Listen to this-"

 

=

 

The rest of the team was anxiously waiting for the news about Barnes. They were all present in the common room of the tower, sitting on the couch and waiting for their friends to come back. As soon as the two of them came out the elevator they bombarded them with questions about it.

“So, what did they decide?” Bruce asks.

“They said that they couldn’t trust us to handle him and wants us to hand him over as soon as possible. I’m sorry.” He tells them looking all dejected.

They had almost believed him, giving him concern and worried looks, if it weren’t for the suppressed laughter from Steve that ruined it all.

“Steve!” Tony scolded with a frown. “Couldn’t you have at least held that in for a few more seconds?” He says exasperated at the super soldier who was laughing out loud by that point.

“I’m sorry but it was so hard.” Steve says wiping away a tear. His face was all red with laughing so hard. “I did try my best.”

Tony pouted. “Well, try harder next time. That was poor performance, Cap. I'm offended to call you my accomplice in crime."

"I promise I'll do a better job of it next time." Steve says with grin. Tony sent him a fond smile.

This was good. He was able to talk normally with Steve. The awkward atmosphere was gone now.

He may realise he loves Steve but his feelings didn't need to get in the way, making it all weird between them. 

As soon as they realized that it was just an act the rest of the team laughed as well. Clint came up to Tony, strangling him playfully. 

“Where’s Bucky?” Steve asks, looking around for his metal armed friend. Natasha tells him that he was in his room. That he didn’t want to come out until Steve came back.

  
Hearing that he ran off to find Bucky and tell him the good news.

Tony watches Steve ran, excitement clearly shown on his face and wonders if he should just shove away his new found feelings.

 

=

 

“Bucky! Open the door. It’s me, Steve.” He says standing outside. He heard a scuffle of footsteps and with the press of a button the door opened revealing a tired looking Bucky Barnes dressed in black jeans and a grey t-shirt.

“Did you come to take me away?” Bucky asks in a timid voice.

“No, I’m not, Bucky. The UN and SHIELD have granted us permission for you to stay with us and recover.

“Really?”

“Yes. And it’s all thanks to Tony. He was able to convince them. So, it was really all him that made it possible. Tony is really amazing, isn’t he?”

“You really like that teammate of yours, don’t you? You’ve been talking about him every time. Even back then when you were taking me back here. You kept telling me how ‘Tony did that’, ‘Tony did this’.”

“Oh, sorry. Did I bother you? I didn’t mean to." Steve says rubbing the back of his neck in a sheepish manner, smiling.

Bucky’s face contorted into something malicious of sort but it quickly faded before the blond could notice it. “Not at all. I’m just glad you found friends other than me.”

 

=

 

Tony called Steve and Bucky to his lab and told them about how they would start the recovery process with his latest invention which would help the second super soldier to regain memories from his past and also to slowly remove Hydra’s mind control over him. A device which he made with Helen Cho's help.

Steve agreed that it was a good idea to give it a try so everyday they would strap the metal armed soldier onto the machine and he and Bruce would check his progress.

Little by little Bucky starts to brighten up. Turning back into his old self day by day. And after the end of the first week he was even able to vividly recall his past memories with Steve now. And he was getting along with the rest of them team too. Well, excluding him of course. Bucky was simply expressionless when he was with him. Well, he'd just have to work on that later.

Everything was going great. And even if Tony couldn't spend as much time with the blond soldier as all his attention was on his recovering friend, he was fine with it. 

It actually helped him in a way.

But then it all went horribly wrong one fateful night.

Tony was on one of his all-nighter inventing spree his stomach started to growl. He asked Jarvis what time it was and was told that it was already 2:30 in the morning. He bent over and opened his secret snack container but found it empty. He then decided to just get something to eat from the fridge. Maybe there was some leftover of Steve’s or Bruce’s cooking. Well, that is if Hawkeye didn’t get his hands on it first.

Tony rubbed his sleepy eyes and dragged himself up to the communal kitchen. It was quiet and the only source of light was from the small bulbs which were dimly lit all around the tower. It seemed like everyone was in bed except for him who was wondering in the night like some nocturnal animal seeking for food.

He looks inside the fridge and winced a bit with the bright lights coming from it. He looked around and found lots of food but they were all in need of a being cooked before one could eat them and Tony didn’t feel like doing it. Besides, cooking wasn’t one of his fortes. If it was gonna be like this he wonders if he should just sleep it off.

Luck came to him in the form of a set aside plate of spaghetti located at the bottom corner of the fridge, neatly wrapped up with his name written on it. It was Steve’s handwriting. It was written like this,

‘ **For Tony** 🙂,' in big, bold letters and at the side was ‘ _No stealing, Clint. You’ve had enough_ ’ in a smaller one.

Tony smiled fondly at it. It was small gestures like this that made him fall even more for the blond super soldier. Steve would make such a great boyfriend.

He took out the plate and proceeded to the microwave to heat it up. Then with the steaming plate of spaghetti in hand he pulled out one of the dining chairs. He proceeded to shove food into his mouth, letting out a satisfied moan.

“You seem happy.” A voice said from behind, startling him. Dropping his fork onto the floor with a clang. His whole body tensed up and he could even feel his hair standing up on end. He looks back to see a dark figure standing a few feet away from him.

An intruder? Why didn’t Jarvis warned him about this?!

“You don’t have to be so scared. It’s just me.” Bucky says coming into the light.

So it wasn’t an intruder, huh?

“Sorry.” He says. “I’m really tired so I feel kinda jumpy.”

“Is that Steve’s leftover spaghetti?”

“It is. I was too busy to eat during dinner time so he left some for me.” He tells him. “He’s really good at cooking isn’t he? Was he always this good?” Tony smiled looking at Bucky. Maybe talking about Steve would help them become friendlier with each other.

But it totally backfired when he saw Bucky looking at him with repugnance. “You Starks seriously disgust me. Waving your money and body at others to gain their trust."

“What are you talking about?” Tony asks, shocked at the cruel words uttered.

“Your father was the same. Hitting on Steve every chance he got. Back then I was just a soldier. I couldn't  do anything to someone as rich and powerful as him so it felt great when I finally got to kill him in 1991. But I have to say, killing your mother was quite boring. She was so easy to kill. I just gave a squeeze on her neck and she died." 

“You bastard! How could you even say something like that?!" Tony could barely held back his tears. 

He watches Bucky pulled out a knife from the drawer. Waving it around and playing with it. Walking closer to the him with every step he took, a cynical smile on his face.

Tony was frozen in his seat. He didn’t know Bucky had such a side to him. They had done everything, every test. That he was probably almost 95% sure that the mind control Hydra had on him was removed. He had even remembered about his past and being all friendly with the others. He was slowly but surely becoming the ‘Bucky’ Steve knew since childhood. The fun loving, girlfriend seeking guy who always stood by his best friend, Steve Rogers in a fight.

What had they done wrong for him to act like this?

He didn’t want to believe that Bucky was always like this.

  
“What are you trying to do?" He stutters on his words, a bad feeling crept up from the pit of his stomach.

Bucky answered by dropping the knife he was holding straight onto the top of Tony’s left hand, leaving a wide slit on the side of his palm. Tony winced at the pain, his blood oozing out.

“Oops. My hand slipped.” Bucky says in a mocking manner. Laughing at Tony’s helpless self.

Tony tries to call for his armor but got his face slammed roughly onto the table. “I know that movement. You were trying to call your armor, weren’t you? You shouldn’t do that. Not if you want you pretty little face all messed up.” Bucky says snickering creepily.

Tony licked his lips, it tasted of blood. It probably got cut when his face was slammed on the table so roughly like that. 

“I see the way you look at my Steve. It’s so fucking clear that you’re in love with him.” Bucky sneered at him making Tony eyes widened in horror. “You are, aren’t you?”

Tony chokes back a cry.

“Oh, you poor creature. Desiring something which you can’t ever hope to attain.” Saying that Bucky picked up the fallen knife, forced open Tony’s palm and slowly dragged the sharp knife across it.

Tony cries as blood starts to flow out and drips onto the floor.

“You’ll keep this quiet if you don’t want me telling Steve about your pathetic feelings for him. He’s too good for you. Besides you won’t want me to be taken away from him again, am I right? He would be so devastated. You don’t want him to be sad, right?”

The brunet nodded timidly, tears were freely streaming down his face now.

“And order that A.I of yours not to do anything unnecessary if you know what I mean.”

With that Tony was left all alone with a huge cut on his palm. What he thought was going to be a peaceful late night dinner had turned out to be his worst nightmare.

With great difficulty he reached up for the first aid kit at the top of the kitchen shelf and patched himself up as best he could with his good hand. Then with a rag proceeded to wipe his own blood from the floor along with the tears he couldn’t help but shed.


End file.
